“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium, and be lost. The world will not have it.

It is not your business to determine how good it is, nor how valuable, nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. 

You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urge that motivates you.

Keep the channel open.”
 

Martha Graham to Agnes DeMillein ‘Dance to the Piper’

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During Women’s Wisdom Circle 2 days ago, as a part of setting intentions, I affirmed the many threads of me and my life that create my unique way of being, unique way of bringing my work to the world.

What are the many threads and learnings of your life that you weave together to create your unique self?

As a Maga woman (or a Queen/Creatrix/Autumn Woman or whatever you wish to call that phase between Mother and Crone) I experience the solidness of gathering these threads and affirming to myself “This is me…There is no other exactly like me”.

My uniqueness includes my role as mother to 3 daughters, grandmother to 6 small people, partner, occupational therapist, psychodramatist, counsellor, group therapist, shamanic craftswoman, teacher, knitter/crafter and Irish pagan…and other roles. What are your roles that woven together make up your uniqueness?

Frida Kahlo

I went to see the Frida Kahlo exhibition at the Sydney Festival with my daughters last week. We all love Frida and she is a role model for weaving your threads together to become your unique self.

There is also a shadow side to this uniqueness which seems to be a theme seasonally at Summer time – the time of the Mother.

Belonging

Because ‘Mother’ as a life phase is so oriented to relationships, the wounding of “Where do I belong? Who do I belong with?” can come up fiercely. Alone-ness, lonely-ness. A child’s unexpressed question translated to the woman – “Who will love me in my unique-ness?” And, unresolved, the wound might be carried through to the Maga years.

I guess that Frida belonged with Diego Rivera – I haven’t yet resolved that puzzle!

I have a stronger sense of Belonging now than ever before. I used to focus on where I didn’t belong, where I didn’t fit. Even when I was younger, I used to think, “How can I make myself fit,” as I suffered the contortions of making myself the shape and texture of what society and those around me thought I “should” be.

And now, I belong with my beloved partner, my family and my work – all of which are unique and treasured. I belong to land and times, some of which I don’t see clearly. And to my friends, of which I don’t have many – well I have lots, but the friends who have been a thread coming in and out of my life and theirs – they are my Belonging ones.

And especially with these 3 women. My children – the children of the Mother phase of my life. Jaime turns 40 this week, so I have been a Mother now (Earth-side) for 40 years. Wow! So much gratitude, and reflection, and a few regrets. We are unique. Let’s celebrate xxx